Why cant I just keep quiet sometimes .. !

okay okay, have gotten myself into a pickle. last week had been full of confusion and turmoil with regards to this club i'm a member of, kept receiving contradicting information and generally the non-functionaing anarchical state of the club was really getting on my nerve - so when it was friday evening when i had a chance to talk to the entire committee i cdnt hold back anymore - let it all come out in the ope, all my issues i had with the senior authorities of the club, some of whom are my good frenz as well ... obviously in the process i managed to upset and hurt some of their sentiments i'm sure. but this time i felt my outburst was justified. it had been too long, and may be someone had to speak up. the only bad part being i spoke too much! i feel. why cant i just keep my mouth shut sometimes? why cant i hold my horses and keep quiet? may be the rebel in me hadnt surfaced in a long time and this was my chance. though i ended up feeling really miserable after the whole showdown ws over. the head girl was crying (ouch!) .. then i think a couple of others who have heard me "bitch" about the head girl soemtimes wee very taken aback, if not to an extent shocked by my so called betrayal when i actually stayed back to console her, cos at that point come what may, she looked to be in the most vulnerable position with all else ganging up on her, and after all she had been my friend - and stood by me in some of my worst times. even though this was momentary, considering I am already back to bitching about her(less tahn two days after the showdown) that day i felt like i should stand with her, may be she's never going to remember that, may be she'll hate me more for all that i said, may be she will nt listen to one thing i said really, but i thought at least i will know i have tried. now if they dont care, fine i have the right to be indifferent and pissed, dont I? considering I have brought up my issues, if they dont regard them and change certain things, fine then, i have the right to boycott them and stay to myself. well i guess its over now. and once the words are out there's nothing i can do to correct things. lets hope things work out fine. thats all for now. phew - the let go of emotions feels good ... can feel the blood rushing in me!